DARK IS THE NIGHT…AGAIN

It happened again. This was the worst.

The darkness began to press in. Press down. Press all around.

It was not the darkness of night. It was that darkness of the soul which battles and baffles us all. Some more than others.

My soul cried. I prayed for the darkness to disperse or, at least, diminish. When that did not happen, I whimpered, “Oh, no” and I whispered, “How long this time?”

Surely you have been there. Perhaps you live with someone who frequently visits that darkened cave. This darkness of the soul is more prevalent for some personalities than others. For some, it is a constant struggle.

I do not suffer as often or as long or as deeply as most. That does not make me a spiritually better or stronger person. That is just the way God wired me in my mother’s womb. I would need to be strong for others or at least put on a good front.

God has been faithful to give me the strength needed to encourage, protect, and hope for those not seeing any light on their horizon.

Last week, I lost all that confidence. It happened in a nanosecond. I was trying to clean something in the kitchen that did not have to be done at that moment. As I approached the trash can, I dropped several plastic water bottles. Two of them still had water in them but no bottle cap.

Water spilled out over the clean floor. Water. Small amounts of water probably rank as one of the easiest cleanup projects.

It was nothing, right? There are no mind readers for experiences such as this. It was the straw that broke this camel’s back.

My life was going through some stressful situations, but things were not abnormal or worse than ususal. However, in that moment, all the weight of that stress seemed to suddenly shift from God’s care to my ineptitude.

Even when I try to help, I mess things up worse. That conclusion on life was an endless echo in my mind.

My life went dark. Really dark.

I began to cry, to sob uncontrollably. I felt as if I were having a nervous breakdown. Thankfully, no one was there to witness the event or my emotional response. Even if there were, they could not have seen into my soul’s darkness.

If you have ever had the lights turned off in your heart, then you know what it feels like.

Difficulty. Disappointment. Danger. Discouragement. Desperation. Depression.

Darkness. Deep Darkness. Depths of Despair.

It feels as if all the weight of the world has been placed on your shoulders and the light of the world has been permanently extinguished.

Frustration: “How long is this going to last?” Fear: “This will never end.”

I open my heart because I know there are others who fight the same battle and wrestle with the same spiritual issue.

Most likely, you have heard or struggled with this thought: “Christians should never be depressed. Where is your faith?”

Have you read your Bible?

What about the cries of David in the darkness? I am so low; all I do is cry all day (Psalm 38). Why is my soul so downcast? Why am I so discouraged? (Psalm 42). How long will you forget me, Lord? Forever? How long will you look the other way when I am in need? How long must I be hiding this daily anguish in my heart? O Lord my God, I do not want to die in this darkness (Psalm 13).

Can we even speak of the darkness Job endured the night the lights were turned out in the land of Uz? (James 5:11). I hate my life. My soul is so bitter (Job 10:1).

Following a great spiritual victory, Elijah sat in the darkness overwhelmed and alone. The great prophet was so emotionally exhausted that he prayed to die. I have had enough, Lord; let me die (1 Kings 19:4).

Paul recounted the dark nights chained in prison, floating on ship wreckage in the ocean, and the many times he was beaten and dropped off at death’s doorstep (2 Corinthians 11:23-28). We were so burdened we despaired of life itself (2 Corinthians 1:8).

What about Moses sitting in the darkness of banishment, grief, and rebellious challenges to his leadership? Hated. Misunderstood. Alone. (Acts 7:25-29). Nights full of weariness, weaknesses, and worries.

Joseph battled distress, rejection, and false accusations for most of his life (Genesis 42:21). Do you think he ever struggled with despair while in the pit or prison or alone in those dark nights of captivity?

Hannah prayed in the darkness for years and years without seeing the light of hope. Her heart was deep in anguish as she wept bitterly night after night under a rival’s ridicule over her childless life (1 Samuel 1:10).

Naomi’s loss of husband and sons left her with no way out of the darkness. I have no hope. I am bitter about life. The Lord’s hand is against me (Ruth 1:12-13).

Jonah saw the prospect of death as far better than what life offered (Jonah 4:3).

What about Jeremiah’s laments of loneliness and insecurity? Will I ever see the light again? (Jeremiah 20:18).

And what about the spiritual darkness and emotional anguish Jesus experienced in the Gethsemane Garden? Jesus was overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death (Matthew 26:38).

Have you read your Bible?

In this world you will have trouble and tribulation with many trials and sorrows (John 16:33).

This earthly life is chasing the wind. What is wrong cannot be made right; it is water over the dam; and there is no use thinking of what might have been (Ecclesiastes 1:12-15).

This world is broken. Life has been messed up.

Death is the big reminder of that reality. Sorrow is never far away. The tracks of our tears are everywhere.

Accidents. Addictions. Abuse. Aging.

Failed marriages. Wayward kids.

Cancer. Conflicts. Wars.

Suffering. Sickness. Self-centeredness. (Dare I say it?) Sin.

[Note: I see sin as the attitude and actions of loving yourself more than loving God or others.]

Almost nothing is as it was created to be. We were created to long for good and pursue happiness. However, we do not control the amount or timing of hurts, hardships, and burdens.

At some points in life, the unwelcome circumstances turn out the lights.

What can you do when dark is the night…again?

Have you read your Bible?

Ask the Lord to turn the light back on just as David did in his darkness. O Lord my God; give me light in my darkness (Psalm 13:3).

“GOD IS STILL GOD WITH THE LIGHTS ON OR THE LIGHTS OFF.” (Alistair Begg)

God is the Creator of light (Genesis 1) and the Father of lights (James 1:17.)

The stories of these Biblical examples were recorded to encourage our faith and hope in God.

They all lived in the cave of their heart’s darkness. Some for moments. Some for years. Some in repetitive cycles.

God did not chastise or express disappointment over their soul’s despondency. God turned on the lights. He sent angels. He renewed strength. He encouraged hearts. God gave help and hope, food and friends, compassion and children.

Sometimes, God spoke in a still small voice and sometimes God roared from the heavens. God was always there, even in the dark night.

Have you read your Bible?

All these encouragement examples learned to trust, smile, and hope…again. They had a change of attitude while still in the shadows of darkness.

Attitude is largely shaped by perception of life’s hardships and burdens.  

The light of God’s Word helps shape and sharpen one’s perception with the reality of truth.

When, Where, and How does that happen?

Have you read your Bible?

Note: This is important:

THEY LEARNED TO REJOICE BEFORE THE LIGHTS WERE TURNED BACK ON IN THEIR HEARTS.

I will always trust in you and in your mercy and shall rejoice in your salvation. I will sing to the Lord because he has blessed me so richly (Psalm 13).

Hannah’s face was no longer sad, and she worshiped God…In due time, Hannah conceived and gave birth to a son (1 Samuel 1:18-20).

So, with the saints of the past, we trust and hope (and even sing) while we are still in the darkness. We might need to cry some as we wait for the Lord’s timing to do us the greatest good.

You are never alone. The night will be followed by light.

There is always a ray of hope. The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is God’s faithfulness (Lamentations 3:21-23).

Compassion always comes after hurt. Hope always replaces despair. Joy always overshadows sorrow. Light always overcomes darkness. Always.

Why so downcast, O my soul? Put your hope in God. I would have despaired except I believed I would still see the goodness of the Lord in this earthly life. Be strong and courageous in my heart as I wait on the Lord. God will help me (Psalm 27:12-14).

GOD IS STILL GOD WITH THE LIGHTS ON OR THE LIGHTS OFF.

My hope is built on nothing less
than Jesus’ blood and righteousness;

WHEN DARKNESS VEILS HIS LOVELY FACE,
I REST ON HIS UNCHANGING GRACE;
in every high and stormy gale,
MY ANCHOR HOLDS within the veil.

On Christ, the solid rock I stand,
all other ground is sinking sand. (My Hope Is Built/The Solid Rock—Edward Mote)